Five Best Bond Girls

"Steve in Manhattan" (blogenfreude01) 01/17/2015 at 13:51 • Filed to: None

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My enjoyment of the !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! led me back to the 23 movies in the series, and I did !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . Now let's look at the best, and please weigh in in the comments with your own nominations:

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5) !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ( !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! (1995), Natalya Simonova) - she saves James Bond and a bunch of other people (and, frankly, this movie), outwits the villain, and she does it all with short hair! And she's stunning. It's a shame this actor doesn't work more - her performance here was very good, and she had good chemistry with Pierce Brosnan is what is arguably the best of a mediocre-at-best bunch of Brosnan Bond movies.

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4) !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ( !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! (1989), Pam Bouvier) - another short-haired beauty who saves Bond at the last minute, she can act, she sells every action sequence she's in, and, unlike some I could name, displays a range of emotions. And she can fly a helicopter people! In the Dalton canon, this is no doubt the inferior movie, but Carey is one of the bright spots.

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3) !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ( !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! (1965), Domino) - she's lovely, she can act (watch !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! where she finds out about the death of her brother, start at 0:30), and she has excellent chemistry with Sean Connery. Sadly, she's wasted in an overlong, not-very-good Bond movie (yes, I know of the existence of A View to a Kill (1985) and Die Another Day (2002)). Among the classiest of Bond Girls, she's definitely worth watching.

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2) !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ( !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! (2006), Vesper Lynd) - oh no! (I hear you cry) - how is she not number one?! Picking between Eva and the first place Bond Girl was no easy feat. Eva Green can act, and she's so gorgeous it's almost difficult to look at her. She actually outwits Bond in this movie, and (SPOILER ALERT!) sacrifices herself to save him in one of the most devastating scenes I've ever seen. Bond himself is so devastated that he spends the next movie seeking revenge against her killers. The boys at James Bonding think this is the best James Bond movie yet and, !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! (1963) and !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! (1964) notwithstanding, I agree. If you haven't seen it, watch this movie and watch !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! right after - the second one makes more sense that way.

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1) !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ( !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , Tracy) - what can you say - it's Dame Diana! She's classy, she's articulate, and her acting is flawless ( see also , !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ). She's the only woman Bond married (and believe you me, you'll see her resurrected in a Daniel Craig movie). She pulls !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! out of George Lazenby when (SPOILER ALERT!) Tracy is gunned down shortly after their wedding (that scene gets me every time I watch it). Sure, the rest of Lazenby's acting is wooden, but you should revisit this movie - I did, and it's much better than you think. And you do not fuck with !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . And, of course, !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! is the second-brightest star in the picture.

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Honorable Mention - !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ( !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! (1985) Mayday) - now stick with me here. She sells the crap out of every action sequence she's in and looks realistic in her stunts. Her line readings are very good given that the premise is bad and the script is worse. When she (SPOILER ALERT!) switches to Bond's side in the third act, she makes it completely believable, unlike other Bond Girls who have done it. She's better than Christopher Walken in the this movie, and that's saying something.

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ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 14:00

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The dialogue between Bond and Lynd is astoundingly good. Especially their first meeting on the train.

It's like watching firefight, but only with your ears and word-bullets.

ttyymmnn > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 14:04

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I have to cast a vote for Daniela Bianchi in From Russia With Love . Not only is she drop dead gorgeous, but the film was by far one of the best, capturing the essence of the East v. West Cold War espionage thing.

Steve in Manhattan > ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) 01/17/2015 at 14:05

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Indeed - blu rays will be here tomorrow, and I'm going to watch the first two Craig movies again, back-to-back. Should be good.

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 14:08

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For Christmas last year my wife got me the blu-ray box set of all the Bond films. It was a surprise, and I am a happy man indeed.

Steve in Manhattan > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 14:08

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Huh - I just noticed what I've done here: a Brosnan, a Dalton, a Connery, a Craig, a (the) Lazenby, and (honorable mention) a Moore. Hmmm.

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 14:10

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Also, I should be ashamed to admit this, but I've never actually seen On Your Majesty's.

I will have to rectify that soon.

Steve in Manhattan > ttyymmnn 01/17/2015 at 14:13

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She was very good - and I keep thinking, should she be here, Sophie Marceau (villain in The World is Not Enough ) or Olga Kurylenko ( Quantum of Solace ). This is a pleasant rabbit hole to fall down ...

fhrblig > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 14:15

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You can have all of them. I'll take Bond.

DrScientist > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 14:15

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uhhhh...

Steve in Manhattan > ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) 01/17/2015 at 14:19

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Sean Connery was so good that Lazenby had a very tough job. Connery fought with the producers over money - they kept him on his contract even though the movies were ridiculously profitable. After You Only Live Twice , he was so over it. I believe they offered Lazenby the next movie, but he turned it down, a decision he regrets. After that, they thought of using an American (they screen tested Adam West! among others) but then gave in and paid Connery $1.2 million to do his last Bond movie, the odious Diamonds are Forever .

ttyymmnn > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 14:22

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I never cared for Grace Jones in that movie, in spite of your convincing argument. Though her presence did afford us with one of the better Bond innuendos (even if the idea of an aged, flabby Roger Moore bedding May Day was far from believable):

Max Zorin : [the morning after Bond sleeps with May Day] You slept well? James Bond : A little restless, but I got off eventually.

I did, however, like Jones in Conan the Destroyer . A barely watchable film (Wilt Chamberlain???), but she was perfect for the role.

Steve in Manhattan > fhrblig 01/17/2015 at 14:32

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He's the one you'd take, but who do you think has played Bond best?

DrScientist > fhrblig 01/17/2015 at 14:36

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ha... he lived in my building for a while. my girlfriend would go all weak in the knees when we'd share the elevator. hell, i probably wouldnt turn him down.

really nice guy too by the way.

Steve in Manhattan > DrScientist 01/17/2015 at 14:38

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She is consistently ranked in the top 5, but I don't see it. Like Britt Eklund's character, the writing on her part wasn't very good (to be fair, I haven't seen this movie since ... early/mid 90s? I'll watch it again). At least they didn't write her character as dumb as Britt's.

Steve in Manhattan > ttyymmnn 01/17/2015 at 14:40

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That line is nominated all the time as one of the worst in the series. For me, the only time Grace fell flat was when Roger Moore kissed her, but that's hardly her fault. For many people, Moore's sexual chemistry with all of his Bond Girls was not very good. He makes it look like a chore.

fhrblig > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 14:40

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I haven't seen many of them, I'm probably the wrong guy to ask. But of them all, I'd say Daniel Craig is the only one that's made me think, "Hmm, I should go see that."

Steve in Manhattan > fhrblig 01/17/2015 at 14:45

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Casino Royale (2006) is the best of the 3 (5 planned) - I'd watch them in order, and watch Quantum of Solace (2008) right after Casino. Lots of people didn't like Quantum , but I've been told it makes more sense when you watch the two together. Skyfall (2012) is in the middle as far as being watchable, but it's very good.

DrScientist > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 14:46

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i cant say i know dr no (and the others) well enough to make an acting-based assessment of the "bond girls," but that beach scene... especially that knife.

also...

Steve in Manhattan > DrScientist 01/17/2015 at 14:51

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I've heard that. Big box office stars that are nice are rare. The GF has met Matthew Modine - he brought her office Starbucks and was a great guy. I met Paul Newman - a bit aloof, but still pleasant to talk to. Back in 2003 I was at a very fancy client event, and talked to a woman as we were getting a drink at the bar. Very pleasant, looked you in the eye. When I went back to my group, they asked - "what was she like!?" I said "who?". "Gwyneth Paltrow, that was her!"

I still don't believe them. Wouldn't I have realized, even back then?

ttyymmnn > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 15:50

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Okay. I retract my nomination for the innuendo. In retrospect, it's pretty bad, even if it is memorable. I will, therefore, nominate my favorite Bond line of all time (I know, we're getting away from Bond girls, but he said it in reference to Jill St. John). It's the scene in Diamonds Are Forever when he's impersonating Peter Franks and comes to all on Tiffany Case (!) in Amsterdam. All you see at first is her backside as she leaves the room, and she has long blonde hair. She returns, she's a brunette. Bond notices.

JB: Weren't you a blonde when I came in?

TC: Could be.

JB: I tend to notice little things like that. Whether a girl is a blonde or a brunette.

TC: And which do you prefer?

JB: Providing the collars and cuffs match....

The lovely Ms. Case

Steve in Manhattan > ttyymmnn 01/17/2015 at 16:10

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Not the carpet and the drapes, but the collars and the cuffs. Good writing. Jill St. John is lovely, but the acting ... oy.

RedPir8Roberts > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 19:10

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"Best" for me would be the one I'd want to pick up in my Aston Martin. I grew up with Diana Rigg on the Avengers, but in OHMSS, she doesn't really kick that much ass, nor did Claudine Auger as Domino (also an excellent choice). If you wanted to go for that, Wai Lin from Tomorrow Never Dies wins all the things. But for desirability, this list is invalid without Caterina Murino as Solange.

RedPir8Roberts > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 19:20

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If you're doing villainesses, Famke Janssen / Onatopp FTW.

Saracen > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 21:00

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Excellent list. I cannot argue with it.

Saracen > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 21:01

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we differ there....I love Casono Royale, but for me Skyfall raised the franchise to a new bar. Fucking magnificent.

Distraxi's idea of perfection is a Jagroen > Steve in Manhattan 01/17/2015 at 21:15

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Judy Dench needs recognition. Not a Bond "Girl" as such , but her M is by far the best of the Bond franchise's recurring supporting characters, and she's the only woman whose relationship with Bond is complicated enough to need a whole movie to explain it (Skyfall - see io9 on the subject ). Plus she can act the chops off pretty much anyone.

Oh, and if anyone gets to fuck with Lady Olenna: it's probably M.

Textured Soy Protein > Steve in Manhattan 01/18/2015 at 00:28

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My favorite is Caroline Munro in The Spy Who Loved Me.

D > Steve in Manhattan 01/18/2015 at 06:09

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Not entirely sure if she counts for "Bond girl" but Berenice Marlohe is an absolute knockout

Steve in Manhattan > Textured Soy Protein 01/18/2015 at 11:18

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Sure she counts, despite the limited screen time. And honorable mention to Martine Beswick , who was in 2 Bond movies.

Steve in Manhattan > Textured Soy Protein 01/18/2015 at 11:28

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And that one scene? They totally ADRd her.